(tip of the hat to Jason)

Metallica was a class act. I was about 8 feet from one of the main microphones on the 360 degree stage. I caught one of James’ picks. They played for over two hours and were fantastic with the crowd. Although a bit lacking in visuals (they had a short lightshow at first, and a few flames coming out afterward), the music was effing amazing. Lars would get down to his knees and chat with the people on the floor while James would rile up the rest of the crowd. Kirk put in a couple of improvised solos. Top notch show.

Maybe it is this that created the contrast for my next concert: Marylin Manson. All I can say is “Ugh”.

Die Mannequin opened. They’re a fantastic punk/hard rock band. However, the lead singer was so stoned, that her normally pretty voice was absolutely wretched. She was hobbling on a broken foot, re-duct taping it between songs, which probably explains the need to kill the pain. Regardless, at the end of their set, she wouldn’t get off stage. She kept screaming into the mic, to the point where security had to drag her off stage, still clutching the mic that was then cut, to awaiting paramedics. Yowza.

Manson came on and was okay. But I think I was generally put off by then. His show seemed cheap and stupid. He would scream the occasionnal “Haaaaallifaaax!” and stick the mic into the crowd. His setlist was good. But you just knew that it was just another night at the grind for the (now slightly overweight) singer.

Last night was the last chapter of my live show saga of 2009: Comedian Louis C.K. at the Capitol Theatre. Both he and his opener (I forget who it was, and his name can’t be found anywhere) were hilarious. I love crude humor, and he delivers. Rants on life, sex, marriage and racial differences are the bread and butter of comedians; but Louis’ emphasis on today’s youth and society in general are very funny. I’ve seen a ton of his YouTube clips, and I did not hear a single recycled joke. Kudos to him!

Now I wonder if I’ll ever get over my ailments. Probably not. I think my girlfriend is going to leave my sick ass if I don’t get better within a couple of weeks. Echinecea, Vitamin C, shittons of water, fruit and veggies, check. I don’t believe in herbal medecine at all, but at this point, I’ll try anything. FML.

…Nigaz.

This means that Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man- made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second – a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.

[...]

The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each.

In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second.